Lover’s Eyes, Walk Slow - Nines on the Camino

Today began the meseta. I was quite nervous to begin the part of the journey but now after 28,5 km of it, i quite enjoy it. The walking is easier mostly because it is flatter but also because i am fitter. I do wonder if i will lose weight on this journey? 

I left very early today. My albergue-mates woke up at 430 so i arose with them. I was set and ready to take my first steps at 5:01. 8 minutes later i realized that i had left my walking poles back at the albergue so i retraced my steps, retrieved my poles, and set out again. I wonder how far i would return to retrieve something? Part of the Camino is letting things go - what would i let go of if i forgot it? As it gets hotter, i am tempted to let everything go and simply walk with myself and one set of clothes... i think it is inappropriate to walk the Camino naked, so i have to keep my clothes.... i think.

The morning began with prayers once i had my bearings on where i was to go. The Camino is not always marker-friendly and leaving beyond the sunrise wasn’t helping me, but the temperature was! I began praying the rosary the other day, which takes 25-35 minutes. I use an audio app to guide me since walking and reading isn’t a great idea. I enjoy it because it recites loads of scripture and the practice of praying with Mary is a good way to develop intercession (praying for others). I finish the rosary and floods of people come to mind. I always want to stop and write them a note that says i prayed for them. I don’t do this but i love remembering people, especially when the names surprise me. Today i prayed for a pastor i barely know who had a medical procedure a few weeks back. 

I continued walking. The first km were uphill again, and i wondered if the meseta would ever become flat or not.... it does. The meseta is known as the table mountain and spans 40% of northern Spain. I climbed the table today and will walk across it the next several days. In three days, i will walk for 17km (10 miles) straight without a stop on the route. This is rare, so water and food planning will be important.

Today i entered the world of nine energy. The nine energy carries peace and harmony. Richard rohr writes, 

The primal knowing of the NINE is that “I am. I am a manifestation of God. . . . I feel that divine Presence and how that divine Presence is producing this life. It’s all some unfathomable huge unity right now. . . . I feel so harmoniously related to everything that exists. We’re all manifesting out of this Oneness, this divine Presence. . . . This is what NINEs are here to teach and remind the rest of us.” [1]

Hudson explains that the NINE’s passion or root sin—sloth—emerges from the loss of this oneness. The NINE feels, “I don’t exist, I don’t matter, I’m nothing, I’m not real. I’m peripheral. I’m disconnected from everything. I’m a little insignificant nothing. 

NINEs are naturally humble. They allow themselves to be overlooked. They like to stay in the background and cultivate the self-image of not being anything special. They consider themselves simple and uncomplicated and present themselves accordingly.

NINEs are peacemakers. They avoid conflicts. Their gift of accepting others without prejudice makes people feel understood and accepted. NINEs can be unbiased arbitrators because they can see and appreciate the positive aspects of both sides. Their sense of fairness may make them committed fighters for peace and justice. They express harsh truths so calmly and matter-of-factly that it’s easy for others to hear these truths. In the presence of a NINE many people find it easy to come to rest themselves. NINEs somehow harmonize the energy in a room.

—

I am not a nine. But i have a very close friend and several colleagues and students who are. Many pastors are nine, for obvious reasons. My father-in-law is also a nine. I reflected on my relationships to nines. Thankfully the past six years have helped me to not do what i used to do, which was constantly challenge their peace-keeping. A counselor once said to me, “Why is it so hard to practice peace?” I said, “i believe in peace, but i often think we need to wade through a conflict to get there.” I am guessing this perspective is death to a nine. As i walked, I prayed for forgiveness with nines, those for whom i have disrupted peace by asking penetrating and disruptive questions. My father-in-law was a central figure during these prayers. 

As i entered the world of nine, I found a freedom to release the anxieties of work. I wondered what it would look like to value disengaging processes for the sake of greater peace - to trust that the world is harmony? I came to the conclusion: i love my work and love the possibilities, but it is work and not the whole of life. After a long reflection on this, my arms outstretched, and i could feel enormous freedom from the grip I often have on work. The release didn’t lead to feelings of insignificance but freedom and love and peace for the workplace and the environment of work. I wondered what it would look like to treat work like the Camino - take slower steps and to take occasional breaks to simply sit and not accomplish or strive. I was so grateful for the world of nines and realize how far this notion of peace-making and harmonious love is in my grinding and striving actions.

My fast paced first few hours resulted in a long breakfast break in Hontanas. I removed my shoes and socks, ordered breakfast, and sat for 45 minutes doing nothing but watching other pilgrims walk by. I changed my socks and banadaged a few blisters. I ate slowly, and the world felt so peaceful. I can cry just remembering the moment today. What an experience it would be to have this as my mode of operation everyday. 

I left Hontanas with 9km left, and i intentionally walked slower. The pain of my heels disappeared, and i was in utter mind-freedom. Not one thought overwhelmed me, even as disruptive events came to mind. 

In San Anton, six km after Hontanas, i met a German pilgrim. She has some English, and i have minimal German. She mentioned how hard the Camino is because so few speak German, and most who speak English speak too fast. She asked me after five minutes of talking, “Where are you from?” When i said US, she was quite surprised because my English was so slow in tempo. 

I am convinced this is from meditating in the nine space. What would it be to slow down, not simply on the Camino, but in life, so that others might be able to have greater understanding and to be better understood?

When i pondered this experiment late last week, i thought it felt too gimmicky and maybe it is. But today it was a gift. I experienced anger in my thinking but not rage. Not judgment, but peace.

In the words of a former student and current wonderful pastor, Jason Fulkerson, life needs one thing, “let it flow.”